Flowers as peace offerings

"While everyone is dining on the kiss-cam Coldplay concert big reveal – where Astronomer CEO Andy Bryon and the tech company's Chief People Officer Kristin Cabot were caught canoodling – there has been little focus on the spouses who are surely hurting," writes Jill Brooke on Flower Power Daily.

"What can friends say when calling those spouses who are now likely huddling with lawyers, consoling children and dealing with the shock and embarrassment? They can send these flowers which in the language of flowers means support, love and hope for a better future."

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"I'm hoping that Megan Kerrigan Byron, who changed her name on Facebook before deactivating her account, is receiving plenty of sunflowers. It's a flower that reminds us that even in darkness – representing the black middle of the bloom – there are yellow bright petals leaning towards the sun and better outcomes."

"Kristin Cabot's husband, who is the CEO of Privateer rum, Andrew Cabot, could maybe use gladioli – the warrior flower. In the language of flowers, it symbolizes strength and remaining true to one's principles. Named after the Latin word, 'gladius' meaning sword, its a flower encouraging strength and standing firm in the face of adversity."

"Orchids are also a good flower to send. They represent long term perspective since this bloom lasts so long."

© Patti Fowler

"As for the canoodling couple, earning back the trust of their spouses won't be easy."

"At local floral shops, staff hear all types of peacemaking attempts- some feeble and some heartfelt. Dutifully florists write down the message onto a card and attach them to bouquets."

'My favorite is a card that just said straight up: Sorry for being an asshole. I love you,' shares Christy Tehven, from LoveAlwaysFlorals in Bismarck North Dakota.

'I had a customer who would come in and say, "You gotta save me, I screwed up again," says Theresa Colucci, owner of Meadowscent in Gardiner, N.Y. and a former president of the American Institute of Floral Designers.

'My first question is usually how mad is the recipient LOL,' says Patti Fowler, AIFD retail shop owner of Flowerama in Pittsburg, Pennsylvania. 'You can usually gauge at that point how much your client needs to spend. Because I have clients who buy a single flower and others who spend $500 on a make up bouquet.'

"Flowers as peace offerings is so effective that the Teleflora flower company once created a poster about it. Pictured were three different sized bouquets. Small. Medium. Large. Underneath was the tagline, 'How mad is she?'"

"If revived, this marketing campaign could say, 'How mad is he?' Men receiving flowers as peace offerings is not unique and there are even flower stores such as Savage Bloom that specialize in floral choices geared to men."

However, flowers may be an initial peace offering, but as Nita Robertson, the marketing director of AIFD, the American Institute of Floral Designers, said, 'This one will take a lot of roses.'

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"Also, make-up roses should not be red, which is a reminder of passion. Instead, pink roses are preferred as a gesture to say there is still love and let's work things out. White roses indicate purity and a genuine desire to make amends."

"I know of a very famous person who sent a huge heart installation of roses 6 feet high to say 'I'm sorry.' Another florist shared a story of how a regretful husband sent roses every single week to thaw his wife's heart – and it worked. However, I also had a woman I met in a NYC elevator with a big bouquet of flowers. 'So pretty,' I said. 'I'm throwing them out like I'm throwing him out,' she said."

"Studies indicate that around 60-75% of couples attempt to reconcile after infidelity. Some sources suggest that 15% of relationships longterm recover – but those that do indicate having a stronger relationship only by efforts to rebuild trust, open communication, and addressing the root causes of the affair."

"This affair, being so virally public, has far more challenges. Some have surmised that CEO Andy Bryon getting fired from his job feels good in a world where there seemingly is a permission slip for bad behavior with few visible consequences."

"However, flowers represent not only love and forgiveness but also, more importantly, new beginnings."